Thursday, July 14, 2011

51 Days: There Are Little Green Men Everywhere!

Surprise! It's 51 days until we tee it up between the overpasses in downtown ATL. For your endurance of this most monotonous countdown, I applaud you. Your patience will pay off today, as we have a little surprise for you.

As you can tell by the title of this post, it's a little odd. Today begins a four day stretch that means no player reviews thus you'll have to just click through this and, like Tuesday, mutter to yourself, "Why do I read this crap?" Well because you have time to waste my friend! And that's precisely what I'm doing today.

One of my favorite movies is Mars Attacks. The ensemble cast (of which I'm a huge fan) is hilarious. I guess, to put that last item better, the roles for which these actors are cast are hilarious. Jack Nicholson and Glenn Close as the President and First Lady, Martin Short as the Press Secretary, Jim Brown, Natalie Portman, Ray J -- the list goes on and on. Considering that movie, my affectation of all things unknown, and it being 51 days until kickoff, what better to compare our football program to than, of all things,

AREA 51?

Here's why the Georgia Bulldogs football program more closely resembles the famed (or infamed) place:
  • There are a bunch of programs that get a lot of pub, but sure don't relate to much that's based in fact or actual concrete data. See S&C program.
  • The practice field next to Butts Mehre also has this sign. But conveniently the guards that tell you to move on aren't armed and don't have menacing mustaches.
File:Wfm x51 area51 warningsign.jpg

  • There are a bunch of, supposedly, high-powered stealth aircraft laying around. Just like we have all these "secret weapons" that no one has seen play yet. Despite that small fact, they'd still scare the hell out of me were I a terrorist, or Boise State Bronco.
  • We're both trying to reverse engineer things. The Groom Lake site is doing it to alien spacecraft. Coach Bobo is doing it to intermediate crossing patterns and screen passes.
  • For every civilian on or near the base, there are seemingly 23 officers to oversee each one of their daily habits. That's two digs on the Clarke County five-o today.
  • For some reason neither of the two are on the map. Both appeared mysteriously around 2007, but as quickly as they saw the light of day, were kicked back in the cellar by the higher-ups. Here's to hoping that sometime around September 1st someone gets mad enough to divulge some super secret dirt and the whole thing gets blown open. Hey, it could happen?!?!
And now that you've officially dropped 10 points on your IQ...


Next up: 50 Days

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