Thursday, February 10, 2011

Thursday's Hedges Hodgepodge: Tennessee's Football Program Going Down in Flames

This post started out as a venture around the conference to check out the notable goings-on this offseason. I decided to begin my digging with Tennessee and, oh boy, did I dredge up some dirt. Enough dirt to take this little conference whip-around around to full, round-trip Viletown status. Check out what a complete train wreck that place has become. Promise, you won't be disappointed.

First off, there have been some pretty interesting roster changes in Knoxvegas this week- one of which possibly looms very large for the Viles. Rising junior safety (and the Vols best player) Janzen Jackson has decided to leave the team for the semester and withdraw from school in order to deal with "personal issues".  Also of note are the departures of DB Ted Meline and LB Jerod Askew. Like Jackson, Meline withdrew from school for "personal reasons", while Askew was dismissed for a violation of team rules.

My initial guess when I heard about this was that it was probably drug related, as that's usually the case when things like this pop up. Well, sure enough it looks like I might've been right. Apparently Jackson's smoke alarm went off in his dorm room and it wasn't from the bagel catching on fire in his toaster. Jimmy Hyams, a Knoxville radio guy, made some comments this week that indicated that his December 6th dank-a-thon led to Jackson's departure. I guess getting blazed out of your mind constitutes a "personal issue" in Knoxville.

I can't find much speculation on why Meline and Askew left or were dismissed, but I feel pretty safe that it was directly related to Lane Kiffin's complete lack of discretion while recruiting gang members players to head to Knoxville. If you really wanna have some fun, take a look at the only recruiting class that Kiffykins put together in Knoxville. It's a dumpster fire.

CLICK ME!!!
Out of the 22 signings that year, 8 have either been booted off the team or have "voluntarily left". Out of the top eight rated signings that year, only Eric Gordon and Jackson have been real contributors. You'll remember the primadonna they got with Bryce Brown and the trio of angles in Nu'Keese Richardson, Darren Myles, and Jackson. Yikes.

But those haven't been the only developing news stories in Knoxville. Vol legend Chuck Smith, who coached the defensive line last year, was asked to not return after signing a 2-year deal last year at $475k per year. Rumors were that he and DC Justin Wilcox didn't jive and it was causing dissension amongst the coaching staff.  Dooley subsequently promoted a couple folks in-house to fill the vacancies. Couldn't wish them enough bad luck with that situation honestly.

What's most funny about this situation is how elated Vols across the country were when Lane came rolling into Knoxville. Seemingly everyone else in the world knew that they'd be in a world of hurt after he left and.... PRESTO! INSTANTANEOUSLY PWND! Kiffykins and The Orgeron are worse for your program than spent plutonium and minor actinide popovers. It's the most fortunate unfortunate series of events that I can imagine for the Vols... and I love it!

NOTHING SUCKS LIKE A BIG ORANGE!!!

4 comments:

  1. I think the Vol nation fell in love with Southern Cal-smooth Lanester and his drop-dead gorgeous,wife.All of a sudden,Knoxvegas was t-h-e right place to be(and at the right time).The beautiful people completely validated UT as cool and hip.Let's face it,Phil Fulmer was many things but never chic.

    When the Vol nation got dumped for a prettier girl(Southern Cal,again),hell hath no fury like a Vol scorned!I thought it was Morganton,West Virginia with all those fires!

    Lanester and Orgeron have now taken their act out West again...God help college football.

    later,old dawg (who's seen a lot)

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  2. With the huge black cloud already surrounding the USC program, you would've thought that they'd bring in someone that had a scrap of decency about them.

    Instead they brought Cthulhu and his band of Necromancers. It wouldn't take Ms. Cleo to realize that there's an even worse impending scandal in their future.

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  3. To Hell with both USC's!! Kiffin's and
    Spurrier's both!!

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