Thursday, November 11, 2010

Why Not Bacarri "Terminator" or Bacarri "Texas Ranger"?

I was talking with Dawgola's father at the game Saturday and a curious fact came up. Much to my dismay, Dawgola Sr. proceeded to inform me that Bacarri Rambo was, in fact, not born with his current surname. I was devastated and elated at the same time. For some reason, I had never known of this most interesting truth.

So I did a little investigating.

The Florida Times Union of Jacksonville, did a nice little story on Bacarri right before the Carolina game. Hilarity is contained.

"When people see the name 'Rambo' on the back of my jersey, they expect me to be a hard-nosed killer with a scarf around my head and paint under my eyes," he joked. "If I was playing in the secondary and named Fudge, everybody would say I was soft. I went from being soft to being hard."

This is the craziest thing I've ever heard. How does a kid in grade school change his name? A better question to ask is, "How does he have the foresight to pick such an awesome one at age 7?" It boggles the mind. Even though he has been less than stellar in his sophomore campaign, it's hard not to love the guy because of this.

Some other names Bacarri could have considered:

  1. Bacarri Godzilla: Were we playing Hawaii, the team would refuse to show up.
  2. Dirty Bacarri Callahan: Shoot first, ask questions later.
  3. Bacarri Doubtfire: Could anyone stand to be on the field? Every team would just forfeit. 
  4. Bacarri Bond: And we're not talking the Pierce Brosnan or Timothy Dalton versions.
  5. Bacarri McLane: If there were Germans on the field, you know where they're headed.
  6. Bacarri Predator: Cloaking and shoulder cannons? 
Even considering these possibilities, the only thing that would be better than the name change would be if covered himself in grass and dirt and did this (below) as Auburn players ran by Saturday.

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